Woe is ME

I've mentioned before how hard this year has been for me. It started with not one but TWO miscarriages. This has continued to be a physical, emotional and spiritual challenge for me. We thought it best to stop trying after my second to find out what physical problem I was having that was not letting me sustain pregnancy. After a few blood tests, it seemed that hormones where probably the reason and of course completely treatable. But just when I thought maybe there was hope another problem hit me.

Shortly after turning 40 I sustained an injury in my left shoulder one night playing volleyball. I didn't think much of it until I realized the pain wasn't going away. I believed that if I just took it easy, it would eventually heal but instead it got worse....much worse. My shoulder seized.

"Frozen shoulder, medically referred to as adhesive capsulitis, is a disorder in which the shoulder capsule, the connective tissue surrounding the glenohumeral joint of the shoulder, becomes inflamed and stiff, greatly restricting motion and causing chronic pain.

Adhesive capsulitis is a painful and disabling condition that often causes great frustration for patients and caregivers due to slow recovery. Movement of the shoulder is severely restricted. Pain is usually constant, worse at night, and when the weather is colder; along with the restricted movement can make even the small tasks impossible. Certain movement of bumps can cause sudden onset of tremendous pain and cramping that can last several minutes.

This condition, for which an exact cause is unknown, can last from five months to three years or more."

Sounds fun, huh? 

My older sister has suffered from this same debilitating condition for years and has had to endure 4 surgeries on one shoulder and 2 on the other in a desperate attempt to fix the problem. Unfortunately, it continues to be a problem for her. She doesn't have full range of movement in either of her arms, she still has pain and sleeping normally on a bed has become something she can only dream of.

Frozen shoulder hurts like hell and it's more depressing than you can imagine. I get muscle spasms in my bicep every time I run for longer than 2 miles. I can't lift anything, I can't dress normally and even wiping my butt hurts. If you could only see my armpit! It's nearly impossible to shave thoroughly when you can't pull your arm away from your body. It's amazing how many everyday things you take for granted like simply styling your hair, until you can't do them anymore but the worst is when I accidentally jar my arm. It's absolutely the most painful thing I have ever felt. I'd rather give birth and break a dozen ribs than to have this pain EVERY....SINGLE.....DAY.

I've had an x-ray, MRI, cortisone shot and I've tried therapy. It's so frustrating that no one has conclusive answers about what exactly has caused this and what will treat the cause instead of just treating it with extremes. I was told my frozen shoulder was exasperated from my injury but now I'm not so sure. My specialist wants to put me under and do what's called a "manipulation". They basically force your arm to move tearing any scar tissue that's further binding it. The surgery is not without risk. Sometimes they break or dislocate bones in the process. My problem with the whole idea is that there is NO GUARANTEE that the problem will be fixed e.g. my sister's case. I have prayed about this and feel that surgery is not an option (unless I get completely desperate). I believe once I go down that road, I'll always have to go down that road but I want to treat what caused it in the first place! My theory is that if I can determine THE CAUSE, then I can treat and it will hopefully fix itself.

So a friend of mine lead me to some research that suggests a congested liver may cause frozen shoulder. At this point I'm willing to explore anything so I looked into it. Guess what else congested liver causes??? Miscarriages. I've learned that I have about 12 additional symptoms that fit the congested liver theory. So I did my first liver cleanse about a month ago and it went well. I definitely have a toxic liver if nothing else. I had flu like symptoms for THREE days. The normal is one and yes, I was quite miserable. I'll need to do one every 2 weeks or so to see if it's going to help anything. I'm also going to start an ultrasound therapy so that I'll be attacking the problem from both the inside and the outside WITHOUT surgery. 

I'm keeping my fingers crossed but most importantly, I'm beginning to feel a little hope for the day I'm pain free...... and pregnant.